So, this is the situation.
They had been involuntarily transported to another universe by the actions of an individual named Mr. Morningstar, who had explained the threat they faced and the catastrophic consequences that the actions of their mysterious enemies could unleash on all realities.
Wednesday and Enid Addams had ended up in a universe very similar to their own, face to face with two teenage versions of themselves from their days as students at Nevermore, whom they had not yet been able to explain the situation to, because, having barely recovered from the initial shock (and not entirely), Marilyn Thornhill... that is, Laurel Gates, had made an appearance.
And out of sheer instinct, Enid Addams had knocked her out with a single blow.
And so things stood, with an unconscious Marilyn Thornhill/Laurel Gates being tied up by Wednesday, while Teen Enid seemed on the verge of having her first wolf out from sheer stress, and Teen Wednesday watched the proceedings with cautious attention and no small amount of interest.
“I'm as enthusiastic about gratuitous violence as anyone else, but I confess I find this display against a teacher puzzling,” said Teen Wednesday, glancing at the two Enids before turning her attention to her roommate, “Between your ruthlessness in dealing with our competitors to get that cup and this demonstration of your future self, I must confess a certain admiration for your potential for violent behavior, Sinclair.”
Teen Enid did not respond verbally, letting out a simple canine whimper as her face flushed visibly. Her previous nervousness had given way to another kind of nervousness upon hearing those words.
Enid Addams looked at the scene and shook her head fondly before returning to her wife's side. Wednesday had finished tying Thornhill up.
“This will keep her still,” said Wednesday, “She'd have to be the best escape artist in the world to get out of those knots.”
“What do we do now, Weds?”
Wednesday shot a calculating glance at her teenage variants. Teen Wednesday responded with a glare of her own, while Thing, perched on her shoulder, watched silently. Teen Enid shifted her gaze from one to another, as if expecting a confrontation.
“Now we're going to sit down and have a calm and productive conversation.”
Teen Enid suppressed a shiver. “How did you make something so innocuous sound like a threat?”
“Years of practice,” Wednesday replied with a half smile.
Teen Enid proceeded to sit down on her bed, immediately grabbing one of her stuffed animals and hugging it for comfort. Enid Addams approached her and asked, “Do you mind if I sit next to you?” When Teen Enid nodded, her adult self smiled and sat down next to the young girl, glancing around the room.
“Gosh, this brings back so many memories.”
Meanwhile, Teen Wednesday had sat down in the chair in front of her desk with Thing jumping on the table. The adult Wednesday remained standing with her arms crossed, casting one last glance at the unconscious Thornhill before beginning to speak.
“I'm sure you have many questions...” she began.
“Like a million!” interrupted Teen Enid before being silenced by a simultaneous stare from both Wednesdays. Enid Addams patted her younger variant calmly on the back.
“Patience,” she said.
“It would be best to start with the basics,” Wednesday continued, “As you know, Enid and I come from another universe. We arrived here unintentionally, but with a specific goal in mind.”
“To protect you,” said Enid Addams, looking at Teen Wednesday.
“I don't need protect...” the young girl began to say before being interrupted by her adult self, “Yes, you do.”
Teen Wednesday frowned but said nothing. There was a moment of silence before Wednesday continued, “They call themselves the Normalcy Nine. They are a group of individuals from different universes who aim to eliminate the Addams Family in general, and Wednesday Addams in particular, from all existence.”
“And if they do and they kill you, not only do you die, but your whole world dies,” added Enid.
“What? How?” asked Teen Enid, alarmed.
“We don't know the exact mechanism, but the weaponry they use causes a chain reaction that disintegrates all reality after the death of the murdered Wednesday,” explained Wednesday. ”Unfortunately, we didn't receive much more information before being unceremoniously thrown here, something I intend to rectify as soon as we return.”
“Someone wanting to kill me is the least outlandish thing you've just told me,” said Teen Wednesday, “Your references to Grandmama's book make me want to believe you, but your story is...”
“It's too much,” said Teen Enid, “It's... it's a lot to take in. As if the serial killer in the woods wasn't enough, now we have this.”
Teen Wednesday's eyebrows rose as if she had realized something. “Thornhill,” she said, looking at her adult self, “Thornhill has something to do with what's happening in Nevermore, Rowan's death, and the creature that attacked him. That's why your Enid reacted that way.”
“Marilyn Thornhill's real name is Laurel Gates,” said Wednesday. “I'm not going to explain her whole story right now, but you should know that she's a homicidal bigot who has hatched a plot to destroy Nevermore and all the outcasts.”
“But... but... she was one of my favorite teachers,” muttered Teen Enid, giving a betrayed glance to the unconscious woman.
Teen Wednesday frowned again, “This is a case you've already solved in your own reality, isn't it?”
“And you are now fighting your own pride,” said Wednesday, “I know myself and I know you. You want to unravel the case for yourself without assistance or advice, but at the same time you are intrigued by the idea of resolving the entire conflict as quickly as possible.”
“You are right about the first part, but not the second.”
“Oh?” Wednesday replied, raising an eyebrow questioningly at her younger self, “Even if it means risking more casualties? Or putting people you care about in Nevermore in danger?”
“I don't care about...”
“Yes, you do. Even if you're still too stubborn and obtuse to admit it, too scared to do so.”
“Uh, Weds...”
“She needs to hear this, Enid.”
“What's going on?” Teen Enid whispered to her adult self.
“I think my Weds is giving your Weds aggressive therapy.”
“I'm not scared,” Teen Wednesday replied with stubborn conviction.
“Yes, you are. The idea of forming a bond with someone and having it ripped away from you terrifies you. And I know you'll say that's not true, that you enjoy the pain and revel in loneliness. And it's right, but only when it's your choice. Being forced into loneliness by the cruel actions of others is something you've never, ever accepted since the day of Nero's last walk.”
A deathly silence fell over the room.
“That's not true,” Teen Wednesday replied stubbornly, although the keen ears of the two Enids detected a slight tremor in her voice, “And even if it were, there's no one in Nevermore who I...”
“Thing,” said Wednesday, pointing to the living amputated hand, which continued to watch the scene with terrified interest, “And Eugene,” she continued. Finally, she pointed to the young werewolf sitting on the bed who had unknowingly dug her claws into the stuffed animal she was hugging. “And of course, Enid.”
“Oh, of course,” Teen Wednesday said with a sneer, “You're only saying all this because of your bond with your… wife.” She uttered the last word as if it were poison.
Teen Enid tried to suppress the unexpected hurtful feeling that crossed her chest when she heard it. Enid Addams remained impassive.
Wednesday Addams merely rolled her eyes, exasperated with her younger self, “And now you're lashing out verbally and overcompensating with aggression to deny my statements by clinging to a nonsensical argument that barely has a tangential connection to what we were talking about.”
“It's obvious that falling in love has turned you into a fool, just like Father and Mother.”
“Father and Mother were fools long before they met and fell in love,” Wednesday replied.
“Love makes you soft. Weak.”
“Love has made me stronger, more dangerous, and more lethal than I have ever been,” Wednesday replied, “And there is nothing wrong with being soft. It means you are brave.”
“Where did you get such nonsense?”
“I learned it from my daughters.”
Again, silence. Broken by the thud of Thing falling from the desk to the floor as he fainted, followed by Teen Enid: “YOUR WHAT?!”
“Our daughters,” replied Enid Addams, crossing her arms, “Who I hope are okay, with everything that's going on...”
“Daughters,” muttered the teenage werewolf, her eyes wide open.
“They'll be fine, Varadi and Intruder are at home with them and the other children,” added Wednesday, before refocusing on her younger self, who had paled even more at the latest revelation. Her irritation at her past self softened when she saw the young girl's reaction and remembered what things had been like back then. The last-minute confrontation might not have been the right way to go, even though she still believed that her teenage self would benefit in the long run from getting rid of some of her hang-ups early on.
“Wednesday,” she said, “I know this must be like your worst fears come true...”
“I'm going to turn into my mother,” said the teenager, interrupting her adult self, “In the end, she succeeds, I'll be a carbon copy of her and...”
Enid Addams began to laugh. Loudly.
“Er... I don't think existential crises are something to laugh about,” replied Teen Enid, suddenly feeling protective of her roommate.
“I'm sorry, I'm sorry!” said Enid Addams, trying to catch her breath, barely containing the laughter that still insisted on escaping her, “I had completely forgotten about that neurosis of yours, Weds.”
“Enid...” Wednesday began, but fell silent when her wife approached Teen Wednesday.
“Mini Weds... listen to me carefully,” said Enid, “There's nothing wrong with falling in love, and there's nothing wrong with being a mother. And you're not a replica of Morticia. For many, many reasons, but also for the fundamental fact that you are you, and we are us.”
“Our lives are fundamentally different, no matter how similar they may have been up until now. The path you will follow does not have to be the same as the one we have followed,” added Wednesday.
“Exactly. Besides, in romance, you're more like... um, maybe it's good if we show it to you,” added Enid.
“What?” muttered Teen Wednesday.
“Hey, mini-me!” said Enid, addressing her teenage variant. “Say something in French!”
“Huh? But I don't know French. I never studied it. In middle school, I only chose Spanish... I only know a few words from songs and movies...”
“It doesn't matter, say anything!”
“Uh... ok... err... Voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir?” recited Teen Enid, uncertain, remembering a line from a song she had sung many times in her childhood without having the slightest idea of its meaning or context.
“Wow. You went straight for the jugular,” replied Enid Addams.
“Mia lupa,” said Wednesday, “This is very uncomfortable...”
“Naaaah, look...” said Enid, pointing to Teen Wednesday.
Who was staring at Teen Enid with dilated pupils in her wide-open eyes and an intense blush on her cheeks that was unnatural for her.
“It was already happening at this point, although neither of them was consciously aware of it,” said Enid Addams, letting out a sharp-toothed chuckle.
“Enid,” whispered Teen Wednesday, “That's French...”
“Er... yeah?” replied the young werewolf, her sense of smell suddenly assaulted by what could only be a massive release of pheromones coming from her roommate. She couldn't deny that it was affecting her.
“It's... it's...” the teenage Wednesday suddenly stopped, her blush fading, her face suddenly distraught. “Oh, hells. I’m Father.”
The moment was interrupted by a pained groan from Marilyn Thornhill. Four pairs of eyes turned to look at her, but the woman remained unconscious.
“Hmm, I'm afraid we've been... losing track with unnecessary detours,” said Wednesday, “Perhaps we should refocus on the most immediate problem.”
Teen Wednesday looked at the unconscious Thornhill before turning back to the two adults who, in just a few minutes, had turned her entire concept of reality upside down. Finally, she cast one last glance at Enid Sinclair, who was still watching nervously, her cheeks still slightly flushed.
Teen Wednesday closed her eyes, frowning, as if concentrating intensely on making a decision and trying to quell her own pride.
“I... wanted to solve this case on my own,” she began, “But I admit... your reasoning. The danger can only increase, and there are individuals in this place who have... burrowed into my inner self like maggots in a wound.”
“Wednesday,” Teen Enid began as she stood up, but the young Addams stopped her with a wave of her hand before continuing.
“That's why... I'm willing to listen to whatever you have to say,” the young woman finished.
“Very well,” Wednesday replied, before turning to her wife and pointing to the unconscious Thornhill, “Enid, could you carry that human trash, please?”
“Uh… Where are we going?” asked the teenage Enid, “Because I still have like a million questions, especially about… well, you know.”
Daughters.
Enid patted her younger self on the head as she carried Thornhill on one shoulder with ease, as if the woman weighed nothing. “We'll answer what we can, but first... business.”
“We're going to clear up everything that's happening in your Nevermore, assuming that the facts are entirely consistent with what happened in ours,” said Wednesday. “But first we need to fill other people in, one person in particular, so let's go talk to her right now.”
Teen Wednesday knew immediately who her adult counterpart was referring to. She couldn't say she was very happy about it, but she could understand the pragmatism of the decision.
“We're going to talk to Principal Weems.”
NOTES
Well, after giving it a lot of thought and spending a lot of time reviewing notes, I've finally figured out how to organize the upcoming chapters. We've finished the First Act and are now entering the Second, which will consist of a series of mini arcs focused on the different universes presented in the previous chapter. I've decided to visit them alternately, with a short chapter on each one, then another and another, and so on, until the different narrative threads finally converge again to begin the Third Act in a way that I promise won't be as traumatic or terrifying as a certain trilogy of chapters in Kooky Spooky.
We'll see.
Here's a quick overview of these mini arcs and who's involved in each one:
The Once and Future: This is where we are in the chapter you just read, with our Weds and Enid dealing with versions of themselves closer to the S1 canon.
Future Imperfect: Taylor and Eneit in a futuristic cyberpunk universe where outcasts don't seem to be welcome.
Family Biz: Shark, Eamon, and Parker meet the mafia version of the Addams Family.
Eldritch: Needler and Saint-Clair have to deal with a Mary Sue.
Woe's Finest: Pup and Wod find themselves in a superhero universe where Enid is basically Supergirl. Sorry... SuperWolf.
The Next Generation: Friday and Woe meet Vega Addams and Sora Toriyama. Hilarity ensues.
The Here and Now: glimpses of the main universe and the adventures of the kids, Varadi, Intruder, and Theo & Dora.
And finally, a (in my opinion unnecessary) translation:
Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?: (french) Would you like to sleep/have sex with me tonight?
The art used in the mosaic is the work of umbra-ultimecia, on Tumblr.
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